1st Stage: Developments

Idea 1

There are a number of developments I would like to make to my first idea to improve it and make it more interesting for the audience:

1. I would include the radio that plays at the beginning of the scene when the girl is getting ready in the supermarket as well. I would make sure that it is a relatively happy and upbeat song an I think it would be a good idea for the girl to be singing along to it to give the audience the impression that nothing is wrong and that there is a happy and cheerful mood, giving them more of a shock when they see she has discovered a dead body. 
2. I will consider using an eye-line match when the girl discovers the body so that the whole scene isn't just from PoV. This will make the scene more interesting because there will be a variation in shot, but also more thrilling to see the girl's reaction to the body before we see what she is reacting to. 
3. Adding moments of anti-climax may also help to make the scene less monotonous. For example, there is a shot of petrol leaking out of her car and so the audience think that there will be a problem with the car but there isn't, and then seeing something on the shelf and mistaking it for something else to make the audience think that will be where the mood changes etc. so that they are less expectant of discovering the body and there will be more excitement and interest created throughout the entire scene. 

Idea 2

I would also like to make some changes to my second idea to make it more engaging and thrilling:

1. Instead of an organ playing, I would change it to a hymn being sung because I think that an organ may become overpowering and take away from the meaning of the scene. I think I would have the hymn as a non-diegetic soundtrack to ensure that the figure is alone in the church to add to the mystery and suspense of the scene. I think a hymn is also more creepy than an organ playing and so will scare the audience more and add anticipation to the scene. 
2. I think that the screams at the beginning of the scene may distract from the overall calm mood that I want to get across in the scene and so I will get rid of the screams to ensure that the mood is still and calm to give the audience a sense of tension and expectancy of what will happen. I think I will still have a shot of the graveyard to give a subtle hint to the audience that a death has taken place, but also to make sure that the whole sequence is not set in just one location and then becomes boring for the audience.